Oh, sorry, that was just me turning into The Hulk, because apparently I HAVE. I�ve been noticing something lately that does not please me, but I tried to ignore it. However, I could no longer deny the obvious after the countless minutes that I spent this morning trying to find a shirt that would fit me. They�re all too short! And it�s not that my pants have gotten any lower. They�re the same shirts that I�ve been wearing, some of which I have had for a good two years, but all of a sudden they no longer fit me properly. And I can�t even blame the washing machine, because some of them are hand wash-only, and some I haven�t even worn since last summer. However, they all seem to have banded together to mock me. Seriously, they are like bibs. What is going on? I know I put on a few pounds and all, but it wasn�t that many since I last wore some of these shirts. Some I wore a few months ago! I think I gained one or two pounds since then � not enough to make my clothes all magically stop fitting. The weight must have just re-settled itself somewhere in my upper body. And as much as I adore my bigger boobs, they�re not THAT big to make all of my shirts ride up. I wish it were so, but really � it�s not. So I really want to know one thing:
What made me so angry that I turned into The Hulk? When I'm not in full-on Hulk mode, will I now hear the sad "Do do do dooooo" music whenever I say goodbye and head off into the sunset, looking forlorn as I hitch-hike to my next unknown destination? Because, admittedly, that would be kind of cool.
Okay, make that three things, the final question being this:
Who will buy me new shirts?
Because really: bibs. Maybe I should be happy that tunics are all the rage? No, I still can�t bring myself to celebrate that. I�m still fully against that. And I really don�t want Mom Jeans to come back just so they can move upwards and meet my incredibly shrinking shirts. And as much as I love to shop and would enjoy buying new shirts, there are two issues/problems with that scenario: 1) The hideous clothes out in the stores right now & 2) I really love a lot of my shirts. I want them to fit!!! THE SKULL SHIRT DOES NOT FIT ME, PEOPLE. [Note: The skull shirt is this awesome sleeveless shirt that I�ve had for many years � it�s red and has a picture of a smiling, bedazzly skull face on it. It used to be my first date shirt. It just rules. Look at it!
Whenever I used to ask Lucy what I should wear somewhere, she always answered, �You can never go wrong with the skull shirt.� And she was right. When Frito and I started getting close and realized that we were the male and female version of each other, it was also discovered that he owns the EXACT same shirt in blue. It�s so creepy how much alike we are. So you can understand how upset I am about the skull shirt � it has been my go-to shirt for ages. I was wearing it when I met Debbie � oh, sorry � DEBORAH Gibson and she said, �I love your shirt!� Such is the power and allure of the skull shirt.]
Lucy just asked me if I�m growing. I�m going to be 32 in a couple of weeks � do people have growth spurts then? Then again, Lucy said that I am Powder, so it wouldn�t be anything strange for me with the array of medical mysteries I�ve had go on. You know what? As implausible as it may sound, I�m going to go with that as my explanation simply because it�s also pretty awesome. The next time my doctor wants to do a bone density test on me, I�m going to scoff and say, �There�s a chance of early osteoporosis for me because I had a hysterectomy so young? Pssshh! I�m still growing, bitches! Check out my bib-like shirts!� I�m also going with the freakish-�I�m still growing!� explanation because the alternative of me maybe getting my middle-age spread early is just not going to cut it.
Look Ma, I�m growing!!
'Why I Love YouTube' Clip of the Day:
This is one of my all-time favorite Electric Company cartoons. It gets stuck in my head for days whenever I hear it.
before & after
2007-09-26 - Follow Me!
2006-09-30 - Site Move & Favorite Entries
2006-09-25 - Evil Easter Bunnies & Rock Climbing!
2006-09-22 - Shameful-Purchase Hiding & A New Dentist Plan
2006-09-19 - Birthday Picture/Video Diary & The Wheelmobile
Copyright 2003-2006 by Sockgirlie. Stealing is wrong.