It's Halloween and things are ghoulish, indeed. Well, at least they were the other night. Saturday night we headed out to costume karaoke as we did last year. At first, I had planned to go as a Nun-Whore. Eric (The Original Nun-Clown) and I had come up with the idea while toying with the possibility of there being 3 Nun-Clowns in the states this year. When I suggested more of a Naughty Nun look for myself (as modeled after characters in his Sisters By Habit screenplay), we started rubbing our hands together with delight, Eric exclaiming, "It's so wrong, it's right." However, unseasonable 40 degree weather on Saturday led to me ending up in a nice and warm Naughty Librarian outfit. (After all, it always has to be about The Naughty.) The quote of the night came when Lucy asked me what was so naughty about my outfit and I pushed open my shirt to reveal a bustier popping out, causing my brother to exclaim in horror, "Put those away!" I didn't think Lucy and I would ever stop laughing. Speaking of Lucy, she started out with the idea of being an exotic flamenco dancer, but ended up in what she dubbed "Slutty Tango Dancer":

Ssshhhhh!

Anyway, all was going well at the costume karaoke at first. I mean, how can the night go wrong when you walk in and see this at the bar?

That person was seriously committed to that costume, drinking through the beak and all. Anyway, so yes, things were going well. There were strangers in costumes,

...I tried out a new song (Band of Gold) that I may add to my karaoke repertoire, Lucy nailed some Melissa Etheridge,

...and my brother brought the house down with his rousing rendition of Oops, I Did It Again. It was all going so well...and then, not so much. My brother, Lucy and I started talking about Karaoke Revolution and the idea that all of us should sing songs from the game. I somehow got talked into submitting Beat It, (it's Sorrow's secret song) but instead of putting us in for our solo songs during the next rotation, the karaoke DJ decided to call the three of us up for our group song. Well, let's just say that some ideas look MUCH better on paper (or karaoke slip) and some songs just should NOT be moved out of the home into a public forum such as, say, a packed bar. And we'll just say that one of these songs is Under Pressure. People, it was unspeakable. Utter madness. People in the bar started getting excited, thinking we were going to break out the Ice, Ice Baby, but instead we unleashed a horror upon them that was truly worthy of the holiday that we were celebrating. Throughout the song, my brother kept yelling that he needed the note bars, while I'm yelling to him in the mic, "You're off key!" The "Eee dee doo dops?" Out of control. None of us were singing together, and I just kept yelling the high Freddie Mercury cry of "Let me out," whenever that part came. The middle of the song? All over the place. The really high "Why" part? Dogs were howling 3 states over. Lucy said it was like being on a careening bus that you know is heading toward the cliff, yet you can't take your foot off of the gas, and once we hit the "why" part, we just broke through the jersey barrier and flew over the edge. My brother said he actually saw someone covering their ears. I think we also scared some people with the one part that we all knew, because we got all excited that we knew it and just started SCREAMING to "Give love, GIVE LOVE, GIVE LOVE!!!!" After that? In the air, off the cliff. Our final whimpers of "pressure" at the end of the song echoed our defeat. We just went back to the table and all declared in unison, "Never again!" At that point, it was rather late in the evening, and we knew we wouldn't get another chance to sing and redeem ourselves because there were a TON of singers there, so we decided to cut our losses and slink out of there. On the ride back, my brother was so discombobulated that he kept running stop signs and red lights by accident. He kept cursing David Bowie and our poor, poor judgment. There was also blame being thrown around, none of it on us, of course.

"That song should come with note bars!"

"Why were the 'ee doo bops' all written as one word? That confused me. It was like I was reading another language!"

"It was written in...Lilliputian or something. Ewokkian?"

When you start using the non-word "Ewokkian," you know you're all out of sorts. I then came up with the idea to stop off at another karaoke place that was on the way home. Now, this could have turned out to be the best or the worst idea of the night - we pulled in to find hardly anyone there, so we went in and pressed our luck. While we were waiting to sing, my brother pointed out a painting on the wall that signified him at the moment, except instead of a flower, he was holding a microphone:

Under Pressure had clearly made him a broken man. Soon after that, my brother was called up to sing. He broke out some ...Baby, One More Time and then marched back up to the table at the end of the song, threw his hands in the air and yelled, "I'm back!" Lucy and I followed suit, redeeming ourselves with some Gretchen Wilson tunes. Phew! We're back, baby! Still, I think the memory of Under Pressure will either haunt us for a long, long time or will get repressed and buried so far down that it will randomly pop up one day when we're 76 and COMPLETELY ruin a fine game of shuffleboard or pinochle. We'll see. It could really go either way.

In any event, all's well that ends well, as I even got the chance to break out the Naughty Nun look today. Eric, my sweet, sweet gay Nun-Clowning Internet Lover, this Naughty Nun's for you:

Happy Halloween, y'all.


before & after





2007-09-26 - Follow Me!
2006-09-30 - Site Move & Favorite Entries
2006-09-25 - Evil Easter Bunnies & Rock Climbing!
2006-09-22 - Shameful-Purchase Hiding & A New Dentist Plan
2006-09-19 - Birthday Picture/Video Diary & The Wheelmobile





Copyright 2003-2006 by Sockgirlie. Stealing is wrong.