Last night I said good-bye to an old love and it was such an empowering thing. I'm the type of person who always knows that the things people tell me are true, but I have to reach that certain point where it finally becomes clear and true to me before I accept it. The decision needs to be made on my terms. Maybe I'm a freak, but in order to get any completion to things, I need to do it all by myself. This is true in many areas and aspects of my life - not just my lovelife. But last night just happened to be one of the times where it had to do with that.

I feel really good. The chains that were rattling from the ghost of him clanging around in the back my head are finally silenced. There is finally an end to the story. That last chapter had been unfinished for a while, and I had really let it fall by the wayside, believing that in time it wouldn't be the last chapter at all - it would just be the beginning to the next volume of the story. But I happily scribbled down those mighty two words last night: "The End."

I thought the best feeling was seeing him and thinking that I wouldn't want him back. I always thought I would take him back in a heartbeat if he ever came around, but now that time, distance, and just basically life have been put together in the blender - out came the freeing knowledge that I wouldn't want him at all. And all served in an ice cold smoothie! He's not the boy I knew before. He's not the boy I loved before. And most importantly, that's okay. I'm okay. Without his ghost lingering, though, I'm stuck with absolutely no boy to think about or pine for and no crush. I like having a crush. Something to bring a smile to my face. But knowing me and my boy-crazy ways, it shouldn't be long. Ask me again tomorrow.

Like I said before, though, I thought the best feeling would have been seeing him and realizing that I didn't want him. But no, I experienced something even better. It's hard to describe, but it was freeing, empowering, and just plain balls-out awesome to turn my head half-back as I was leaving and let out a hearty, "Good-Bye, [boy]." It was amazing to finally mean it.

So now what? I don't know, but I can't wait to find out. Good-bye, indeed. Hello to my new life.

Can I get a "Woo!"?

Celebrity Boyfriend of the Day: Harold, from The Bachelorette
Say what you want, I think he's a total cutie. If I was the Bachelorette and met him and Robert I'd just say, "Stop the show, give me these men." Also, if you were ever curious to know what G McG looked like, take a look at Harold. There are minor differences, but they look VERY much alike. And come on, the guy's name is Harold, for crying out loud. How awesome is THAT???

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before & after





2007-09-26 - Follow Me!
2006-09-30 - Site Move & Favorite Entries
2006-09-25 - Evil Easter Bunnies & Rock Climbing!
2006-09-22 - Shameful-Purchase Hiding & A New Dentist Plan
2006-09-19 - Birthday Picture/Video Diary & The Wheelmobile





Copyright 2003-2006 by Sockgirlie. Stealing is wrong.