My latest paramour-would-be is a guy from my new office. He's very mild-mannered and quiet and pretty much stays out of everyone's way. He passes by my desk to get to the copy machine, so I see him every now and then. A few weeks ago, he stopped in front of the entrance to my cubicle and stood there waiting for me to look up. When I did, I smiled and said hello and he blurted out, "I like your car. That's all I wanted to say. It's really nice." I thanked him and informed him that he just reinforced my policy of buying cars based on whether or not guys would like them. He just nodded his head, mumbled, "Yes, it's nice," and then fled the scene. I didn't really think anything of it until he started appearing more often. And let me tell you something, this man is just odd. He's harmless, but ridiculously odd. And it has nothing to do with his propensity for argyle, either. He's probably also pushing 50. That's just a no right there. No. Just, no. Anyway, his car comment must have been his "in" because a couple of weeks later he just happened to be walking out to the parking lot the same time as me after work and he started asking me more about my car. He looks all around when he talks to me, and he always sounds like he's saying the most serious thing in the world. This morning he smiled when he passed by my desk, and I politely said hello. He stopped in his tracks and peeked his head back into my office to somberly tell me, "Have...have a good morning. And afternoon." He sounded like he was sent to me to deliver some sort of horrible news. I wished him the same, but then he didn't leave this time. He stood there and stammered and started saying things like, "Well, you know how it is. [long pause] I have to work, so [long pause] I'm here every day." He then started to say something but then entered into an even longer pause, moving his mouth as if to form words, all the time pointing to his left temple. I sat there looking up at him, wondering in my head how long I had to keep the fake smile and "I'm interested in what you are saying" look on my face. It must have lasted 45 seconds before he completed his thought with the exciting follow-up, "It's work, you know?" I thought I would explode from over-stimulation. Then he started pointing to his head again and I spent the next moment of silence trying not to look bewildered. He's always looking at me and then nodding or looking down. Sometimes he gives these furtive glances. Very odd.

So yes, this is the type of man that I attract. That stupid test can say all it wants about me being "Very Picky," I'll be picky and proud, dammit. If I don't want to go out with a guy again because of his bad answering machine greeting, I won't! (What? It was BAD!) And yeah, so I wouldn't go out with a guy because he gave me flowers with a card that read "I'd really like to see you naked sometime." If that's being picky, well - I'll take it. I'm not really that picky. I have a maybe-date this weekend with a guy who's not my usual type. See, I can expand my horizons. Actually, I'm just curious about it, so I'm going. We'll see. Maybe I should call his answering machine first.

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And now the part where I gripe about American Idol: Is it just me, or do most of the contestants annoy you this year? There's only a few I don't mind. While watching the wild card shows this week, I often felt like Will Ferrell in Zoolander when he starts yelling and asking if everyone was taking crazy pills. Because, really. First of all, judges? You cut Lisa Leuschner and let some of those other people sing? She's probably got the best voice out of anyone there. And Paula with the Leah? You are no longer forever my girl. Actually, I'm not sure you ever were. Thank you for inflicting her grating presence on me for weeks to come. That cocky look on her face when she signs just makes me want to boot her ass to Bulgaria so she can go be a pop star over there like her mom. She'd probably be fighting Hasselhoff for the #1 spot on the charts. Criminy. And finally, Matt Rogers. Dude. You sucked enough already. What was that? You were in the Rose Bowl? Why, I never would have known! But really, what I want to talk about is that cat on your head. Oh, it's not a cat? Dyed astroturf then? No? It's your hair? Oh, it is? Really? Excuse me while I turn away and laugh hysterically now. Rose Bowl, we all know it's a rug. You don't add that mid-show. We know you're thin on top. We've seen it. Look at the idolonfox website. For the love of all that it holy, please, put the cat away. I also hope you get voted out very early. You suck, my friend. Thank you.

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Finally, my mother has asked me to start thinking about my big birthday plans for this year because I had mentioned wanting a big bash. It's not until September, but she wants to start planning some things now if we need reservations for a room or some karaoke or Doug Jones. I'm not sure anyone would speak to me again if I booked that last one. But it sure would be fun to see the looks on the faces of all of my unsuspecting guests. Randommuse keeps telling me she'll book a plane ticket tomorrow if Simply Rod is there. But now I'm thinking of skipping the party idea and flying out to L.A. Jerry tells me that if I did that, I'd simply have to go to a taping of The Price is Right while I'm there. Only if I get to play the punch game! So I'm not sure what to do and I'm looking for suggestions. Party ideas, trip ideas, anything - E-mail me or sign my guestbook. Woo!

Co-Worker Fashion Faux Pas of the Day: Kelly green velour top and matching leggings.

Comments? Sign the book!

before & after





2007-09-26 - Follow Me!
2006-09-30 - Site Move & Favorite Entries
2006-09-25 - Evil Easter Bunnies & Rock Climbing!
2006-09-22 - Shameful-Purchase Hiding & A New Dentist Plan
2006-09-19 - Birthday Picture/Video Diary & The Wheelmobile





Copyright 2003-2006 by Sockgirlie. Stealing is wrong.